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 My Hollowfication (Part 4)

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Male Number of posts : 39
Age : 28
Location : mars
Registration date : 2009-08-05

PostSubject: My Hollowfication (Part 4)   Thu Jun 10, 2010 7:09 am

I quickly ran to the full sized mirror near the entrance to the room, I had to see what I had become if I wasn’t in heaven. I couldn’t tell what I was but the mismatch of different animals seemed oddly normal. My lions mane and fur faded perfectly into the snakes and dragons scaled skin The white mask covering my face seemed oddly familiar and matched perfectly with the three horns growing out of my head

“What are we?” I asked my two other heads, hoping one of them would know what had happened to us.
“We don’t know, we went through the same thing as you.” The dragon said as he finished chewing on the emperors leg.”All we know is that you’re hungry”

I felt the hunger, it was something I couldn’t resist. An urge to feast on the flesh of others. It felt right, felt like doing so would make me stronger, more complete. I burst out the entrance to the throne room and went in search of the nearest lump of flesh to devour, in a quest to rid myself of the hunger. Just one, just until my rid myself of this hunger. I will not allow myself to be consumed by this hunger

Days passed and my hunger went unfulfilled, slaughter after slaughter of the innocent all only a fraction of what i wanted to consume. I had tried to feast mainly on the lower levels of society, the scum that dwelled down the back streets, the thieves living off others work. But I couldn’t resist it sometimes, somehow I knew how of my hunger each meal would fill and the scum never seemed to match up with the respected.

Rumours spread like wildfire throughout the city, a monster was on the loose, vicious murders happening several times a day. This was not the way I wanted to live, but I was hooked, I had to have more. I had to rid myself of this hunger.

I felt ashamed preying on the weak and helpless, killing in cold blood. There was no honour in what i had become but the hunger was such a primal instincts to ignore it was impossible. I longed for a challenge, to kill an opponent who could actually see me and defend themselves. Little did I know that was the opposite of what I wanted.

It was day break when a worthy opponent arrived in town, I couldn’t tell where it had come from but the scent of it filled the air. Such a strong appealing scent, a meal that may fill the void inside of me. I instantly knew I needed to consume them. I set of immediately in the direction of the scent, realising it was heading in my direction Did it know of me? Is it a similar being to me, wanting to consume me? I didn’t care, the aspect of a filling meal thrilled me.

“Oi, you two, wake up” I said sharply to the sleeping dragon and snake. Over the days we had come to an agreement to switch control while the others slept, allowing constant feeding and constant rest. The two heads slowly woke up and instantly realising what was going on.

“Tasty...Very tasty!” The snake said very excitedly as the dragon tried to hide his excitement behind a wide grin.

In a moment we had reached our target, the humanoid figure encased in a black shadow like material. This is going to be a good battle I thought to myself as I roared announcing my presence allowing the figure to prepare for battle.

“You’re smaller than I expected” The figure announced as he turned round, drawing a sword from his side. “I guess, It is time for you to die” He said as he charged forward towards me.

I ducked beneath his sword and smiled, “Don’t jump to conclusions, after all it is 3 against 1” I smirked as Snake lunged from behind me towards the figures throat. “Who are you anyway?” Dragon yelled as the figure leaped backwards a trickle of blood dripping down his neck. He put his hand to his neck as he shouted back what seemed a rehearsed speech “I am a Shinigami, I am the Justice of this world and my duty is to rid the world of monsters like you. Prepare to die!”

“Can we just kill him” Dragon said as Snake flailed about laughing behind me. I smiled and nodded, instantly charging towards my opponent. I sidestepped his downward stabbing sword and instantly lunged forward biting into the side of the Shinigami. He let out a scream and swung his sword horizontally across my spine, cutting deeply into my back. I unhooked myself from his side muscle, to which i had caused considerable damage, and jumped backwards. He quickly followed despite his wound, bending and twisting his sword around in an unpredictable manner, making it difficult to dodge. As his sword made several shallow cuts around my body, I leapt backwards as fast as I could, gaining distance between me and my opponent.

“That was a decent Shunpo” He said, confusing me to what a shunpo was.

“He is not too bad at close combat is he” Snake chuckled to himself, somehow finding this situation hilarious.
“Don’t worry, I got this” Dragon said as he opened his mouth and began to create a mass of Red energy.
“I think it best you get in Close Mihael” Snakey said, realising I was clueless about what was going on.”Just do that thing you just did backwards, but this time forwards”

I hated how these two seemed to know more about my body than me, they seemed to know exactly what I was and they were hiding it from me. They had never steered me wrong before, so I decided to trust them, attempting to reverse the movements I had just done.

I leaped forward, the scenery moving faster than I expected, my opponent getting nearer and nearer. His left side seemed limp and defenceless, that was where I would strike. I stopped feet in front of his left side, him instantly swinging across with his sword held in his right hand.
Before I knew it a beam of red energy fired into the Shinigamis sword, overpowering him in a moment. The beam sent him flying into the sky, landing as a pile of smoking ash about a mile away. I followed instantly to consume my meal.

“I call dibs on the body” Snake yelled from behind
“What? You can’t claim this, if anyone has a right to it Dragon does.” I replied in an annoyed tone
“Who told you to use sonido to get in close?”
“Sonido? Ok you can have the body, but after you have to tell me what you are hiding, ok?”
“Sure” Snake laughed to himself, probably planned to tell me half the story, but any information would be better than continuing with my lack of knowledge.

It didn’t take long to arrive at the body, I was quickly getting used to the fast travelling the Shinigami referred to as shunpo. Snake quickly lunged at the unconscious body of the Shinigami as soon as i neared it, taking his time and swallowing it slowly in one bite. Great I’m gonna have to carry this body around until Snake digests it...

“Ok, so tell me what you’ve been keeping secret...”
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Male Number of posts : 153
Age : 31
Location : US of A
Registration date : 2009-09-19

PostSubject: Re: My Hollowfication (Part 4)   Thu Jun 10, 2010 12:37 pm

Dude...pleeeeeease...change Snakey's name DX
This seemed a bit rushed to me. You discovered cero...which is fine because it's an instinct thing with hollows. You did alot of things based on natural instinct I suppose. But then you got to the part about Sonido. How the heck does he know what Sonido is? Perhaps I could see him discovering it accidently? But actually knowing the name? Then the appearance of the shinigami or your run in with him rather. Perhaps you could have built up to that. Maybe you saw him before because he showed up after a massacre but you hid because you didn't know what to make of him or whatever? I'd have prefered if things weren't so rushed.

Also, I don't think that hollows actually eat the flesh of the living. I believe that it's just their souls they try to consume. They might attack a person to make their soul leave their body but actually eating flesh. I don't know about that. o_O

Like I said, this seemed a bit rushed. To be honest, I'd rather you took some more time and spaced events out. Even if it meant making this single omake like...3 or however many. This one was nowhere near as good as the previous additions to your hollowfication series. I suppose you are just getting tired of writing about this particular topic though and want to move on to your character present day though.


Level 2
EXP 12/50
Unseated Officer
Age: 42
Shikai:  Saihoushi , Shitateya, Cut the strings that fasten...
hp 20
reiatsu 20
strength 5
agility 7
endurance 0
reiatsu control 0
swordsmanship 12
unarmed 0
kido 0
shunpo 0
"To truly master your blade, your mind must be sharper than the edge of your instrument."
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My Hollowfication (Part 4)
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